Day 1544 (Monday) 30th August 2021

It was a gorgeous day again and Huw kindly gave me a lift over to the villa. It was a lot quieter there today because their son, daughter-in-law with their baby have gone back to London and Eduard’s mum has gone back to Russia. Eduard wanted to revise independent prepositions again and he was almost word perfect. He told me that he is really delighted with the progress he has made since we started working together. Towards the end of our hour he ordered me a coffee from the kitchen and a delicious biscuit.

I spent the hour with Olga on the terrace and she was very busy so we finished a little early.

She told me that she is missing the family already and the house feels too big when they leave so I reckon I’ll have to go back to Monaco soon. I love going to the villa and hate catching the train to Monaco so it’s going to be tough. On top of this SNCF started work on the train tunnel between Villefranche and Nice and the trains are going in both directions on one track, so the timetable has been reduced – oh joy!

As I had an online class at 12.30 Huw picked me up because on Friday I walked home and I was very hot and sweaty by the time I got home and I was quite uncomfortable at the beginning of our class.

I had time for a quick sandwich before connecting to Switzerland for two hours. She is a lovely kid but two hours is way too long and the last 15-minutes were a struggle. 

I’m still reading Stephen Clarke and enjoyed these mistakes that are frequently made while speaking French.

Some amusing but fairly meaningless mistakes you can make when speaking French.

Try saying these pairs of phrase. When you can spot the difference between the two versions, it is safe to go to France.

Mon chien vient de mourir my dog just died

Mon chien vient de murir my dog just ripened

Il est fou                 he is crazy

Il est fut                 he is a beer barrel

Comment s’appelle cette rue ? what’s the name of this street?

Comment s’appelle cetteroue ? what’s the name of this wheel?

J’ai pu         I was able to

J’ai poux                 I have (ungrammatical) headlice

Une bouee de sauvetage a lifebelt 

Une buee de sauvetage a lifesaving mist

Je voudrais une table a l’ombre I’d like a table in the shade

Je voudrais une table a l’ambre I’d like a table made of amber

J’aimerais juste un baiser I just want a kiss

J’aimerais juste baiser I want to have kiss

Baisse-toi         duck your head down

Baise-toi         screw yourself 

Tu peses (pez) combine? how much do you weigh?

Tu baises (bez) combine? how much do you screw?

Il a trouve la foi         he has found faith

Il a trouve le foie         he has found the liver

Je vais faire un tour I’m going for a walk

Je vais faire une tour I’m going to build a tower 

J’ai eu un malaise         I feel ill

J’ai eu une Malaise I had sex with a Malaysian woman

The top new inventions to come out of France

Necessity is said to be the mother of inventions. The French have not lived short of this statement. They have produced some of the most creative and useful inventions.

These inventions have changed how we live and has made life better. Some of the inventions seem simple but have been embraced by many throughout the world.

Several companies, start-ups in France meet annually to showcase their latest inventions. 

Let us look at the top 10 French inventions that have changed the world.

1. Braille

The invention of Braille has made a great contribution in ensuring that the visually impaired get to read and write. This invention by Louis Braille has been used since the 19th century.

It is made up of characters that use points to form a code that represents letters. The codes appear in dots form that is raised on the paper.

Louis used a 6-dot system borrowed from the night-time battlefield communications. His invention was adopted in France for the blind people and later by the rest of the world.

2. Stethoscope

Another great medical invention from France is the Stethoscope. This was invented by physician René Laennec in 1816.

He found it uncomfortable to place his ear on the chest of overweight female patients. So, he devised a way to do it by rolling up a sheet of paper forming a tube. He would then place this on the patient’s chest and lean in to listen.

He improved the folded paper to a wooden tube and this helped greatly in diagnosing chest illness. Through the use of the stethoscope, Rene published the first work on the use of the device.

Antibes from the big wheel

3. Pencil Sharpeners

You probably did not know this, but the simple tool that we use to sharpen pencils was invented in France. This helpful tool was created by a French mathematician Bernard Lassimonne.

He was frustrated by having to spend time sharpening his pencil for hours using a knife. This took much his time from working his mathematical formulas.

Bernard, therefore, came up with a tool that did the job faster and better. A few years later in 1847, another Frenchman improved on this invention to what we know it to be today.

4. The hot air balloon

The first hot air balloon took off in France in 1783, an invention of two brothers, Joseph-Michel and Jacques-Etienne Montgolfier.

It floated on air for about ten minutes and was unmanned. Later that same year, the brothers made some improvements on the hot air balloon.

In November that year, the first passengers boarded the hot air balloon for its first untethered flight.

Eze Village

5. Food can

This is another impressive invention that is French. It was invented in the 19th century by Nicholas Appert who wanted to preserve food in airtight containers then heat them in high temperature to destroy bacteria.

The process ensured that food stayed for long periods without going bad. He was rewarded by Napoleon who needed a cheap way to preserve large amounts of food.

Napoleon needed to feed his large army during the winter as they were on the move. Nicholas’ invention got him 12,000 francs.

He used glass jars that were sealed using wax.

6. Mayonnaise

Another food-related product that is a French invention is mayonnaise. How this came about was by accident. A chef to Duke de Richelieu ran out of cream to make his sauce.

He, therefore, whipped oil and eggs making a cream that was named mahonnaise. It was named after the place the French forces had pitched a tent, Port Mahon.

7. Etch-a-Sketch

One of the favourite childhood toys that many have used came from France. The Etch-a-sketch was invented by a French electrical technician.

Andre Cassagnes was not only an electrical technician but also a toymaker and kite designer. This toy was first designed in the late 1950s and was mass-produced in the 60s.

More than 180 million pieces of this toy have been sold worldwide. In 1998, it was inducted into the National Toy Hall of Fame in New York, earning its place in history.

8. Hairdryer

Before the hairdryer was invented, many people used vacuum cleaners to dry their hair. To make it easier for his customers, Alexander Godfrey figured out how to do this.

He was a hairstylist who owned a hair salon, and so the first-ever hairdryer was found in his salon. It was large and difficult to move around.

The hairdryer had a dome-like structure that was used to attach it to the chimney pipe of a gas stove. This way, he was able to blow hot air over his clients’ wet hair fastening the drying.

With time, this invention has been made smaller, light and portable.

Nice Old Town

9. The bicycle

The first-ever bicycle was made in France and did not look like what we know today. The bicycle-only consisted of a frame, later a pedalboard was added making it easy to use.

It was then known as a velocipede, a machine that used the force of legs to move. Those of high status in the society were the only ones that could afford it then because it was costly.

Gian Giacomo Caprotti is credited with the first sketch of a bicycle, this was in 1500 B.C. The design has been improved and transformed into many types for different purposes.

10.  Parachute

Final on the list is the Parachute which was first conceived in the 18th century. This great invention is attributed to Louis Sebastien Lenormand and Andre Jacques Garnerin.

He coined the name parachute by combining the French prefix parasite and chute. The word translates to protect against a fall.

The first Frenchman André-Jacques Garnerin designed the first parachute. He performed tests on the parachutes that slowed a person’s fall from altitude.

Improvement of his invention was done in the late 18th century by Louis-Sébastien Lenormand. He made the first recorded public parachute jump in 1783.

Time for some more failed translations… 

And more cats…

Bored quarantined cat owners have started building majestic cardboard forts for their furry friends

What’s wrong with my cat? People are posting photos of their malfunctioning felines and they are hilarious

Meet Pisco, the big-eyed cat who looks like a real-life Puss in Boots